The Next Step

 

Just before I sat down to update my blog, a friend called me to share her exciting news: she had just become a grandmother that morning.  She breathlessly described her new grand-daughter as being the most perfect, most beautiful, most special baby ever born – although she had yet to actually meet her.  And, of course, that is the way it should be.  A grandparent’s unconditional love is a child’s most precious gift.

Another good friend of mine will become a grandmother in July. My sister became a grandmother a few months ago.  My brother now has four grandchildren.  Another friend relishes her role as grandmother to twins.  So many other friends and family members are entering this new world of grandparent-hood and the transformation is nothing short of amazing.

It is almost magical to watch the change which occurs when one goes from simply being a parent of an adult child to suddenly holding that child’s newborn baby and out of the blue realizing that THIS is the moment you have been waiting for all your life.  Any grandparent will tell you how amazed they are at the strength of the love they feel for their grandchildren from the moment they are born.  How often I have heard grandparents say “I didn’t expect to feel this way”.   Almost every new grandparent I have known has said it is not possible to imagine that feeling of holding your first grandchild, or how it changes your world.

This new little life can do no wrong, is perfect in every way and is so very much loved.  There is a special relationship between grandchildren and their grandparents, and it is created the moment the child is born. New grandparents marvel at the instant bond they feel, a bond which lasts a lifetime.  This bond and unconditional love is shared by grandparents and grandchildren everywhere. It is unique and it is wonderful. Witnessing – or receiving - this love is incredible just by the sheer strength of it. 

How fortunate these little grandchildren are to have grandparents who give them unconditional love, have time to spend with them and who make them feel so special.  Grandparents can kiss hurts away, share secrets and see to it that their grandchildren bask in their unquestionable and undeniable love. Most importantly, children know that in the eyes of their grandparents, they are perfect.

I read once that becoming a grandparent is God’s reward for growing old.  As I watch friends and family blossom in their new role as grandparents, and take this next step in life,  I think that this is indeed true.  Embracing life’s next step . . . it’s a good thing!

A Gal's Best Winter Friend

“Fill ‘er up?” The friendly gas attendant at my favourite filling station asks through frozen lips hidden behind a balaclava.  “Anything else I can do for you?” he asks.   I gratefully reply, “Maybe just some gas-line anti-freeze, please” to which I get the pleasant “You bet”, even as I notice ice crystals forming on his eye lashes.

This is a conversation which has, no doubt, taken place many times over the past couple weeks in Prince Albert,  as we experience a few of those never-ending days of deep cold.  On a bitterly cold winter day, when my gas tank hits the empty mark, I can think of no one I appreciate more than the friendly men and women who pump gas for me.  I have extended my appreciation to them other times in my column, but each cold snap reminds me how grateful I am.  As I dislike filling my own tank - even in pleasant weather - I always appreciate the employees at the filling station, winter and summer.  However, I am the most thankful when those arctic winds start blowing and the weather turns cold. It always amazes me how friendly and helpful the attendants are, even in frigid temperatures. They are great ambassadors for their employers. They always impress me with their smiles and pleasant personalities.  After all, I would let them pump my gas even if they were not nice to me!

I feel a little guilty when they find a moment to go inside to warm up while my tank is filling, and they stand by the door shivering from the cold, noses running and icicles forming from their eyebrows (but not guilty enough, obviously, to fill my own tank).  Even as they warm up, knowing they are heading back out into the cold in a few short minutes, they are still eager to carry on a friendly conversation, chit-chatting, fingers exposed through their flip-top mitts.  These are truly amazing people and we should not take them for granted.  If we do, we might have to brave the cold ourselves and pump our own gas.  I don’t know how many pairs of long johns, under-shirts, sweaters, gloves and scarves one would have to wear to be that happy working in cold weather, and I don’t want to know.  I am just grateful that someone else has figured out how to stay warm while handling a gas nozzle.

In these bitter days of cold weather, I extend a heartfelt thank you and offer up a high-five - through flip-top mitts, of course -  to gas attendants through-out Prince Albert for your much appreciated service and friendliness.  Who care about diamonds – you are a gal’s best friend!  Having friends you can count on to get you through the cold . . . it’s a good thing.

Happy New Year

 

As much as I love Christmas, once it is over I am anxious to have things return to normal.  Our tree is hauled away and all the ornaments and decorations are packed and put away before New Year`s Day.  It seems that once the big day is over, the things that were so beautiful the day before are now in the way and cluttering up the house. I carefully place each treasured ornament and decoration in its storage container, knowing I will enjoy them all over again next Christmas. Perhaps it is because New Year`s Day is all about a fresh start, new hopes and plans for the incoming year,  that I feel the need to clear the house of Christmas reminders.  Somehow it seems you shouldn`t start the new year by putting away last year`s decorations.  Maybe by doing this, it feels like two separate special holidays.  I guess I`m not really sure why I do this, but by the time we ring in the new year at our house, all evidence of Christmas is gone. 

I enjoy spending New Year`s Eve and day with family and friends.  There is no better way to welcome the new year than by spending it with people you love. Together, you say good-bye to the old year and share hope for the new year. 

2013 stretches out in front of us, a blank page not yet filled, full of promise and hope.  We make resolutions – some we keep, some are forgotten by the next day.  Each year we think this will be the perfect year.  And while each year may not be perfect after all, we need to reflect on and remind ourselves of all the good things in our lives.  We live in a country where we enjoy incredible freedoms and social programs, everyone has access to education and employment. We live in a society which, for the most part, values family and children.  We have relatively quick and easy access to medical help when we need it. We have time for leisure and to enjoy ourselves. We are so fortunate and rich in ways that people in many other countries can only dream about. 

            No matter how 2013 turns out, we should enjoy our good fortune and appreciate the many blessings we have. Be sure to make time to spend with family and friends.  Volunteer to help someone in need.  Make time for yourself.  Do the things you love to do. Sometimes we need to make our own happiness to have the perfect year.

            I hope you had a wonderful start to the new year with people you love and that 2013 brings you joy, happiness and health.  Starting off the year with a clean slate . . . it’s a good thing.  

The Magic

 

Christmas is my favourite time of year.  There is excitement in the air and goodwill.  I savour everything the season brings: the hustle and bustle of finding that perfect present, gift wrapping, decorating the house, trimming the tree and baking.  My favourite part of the holiday season is spending time with friends and family. Celebrating with the people I love has always made any holiday special, but is even more special at Christmas.  

This year, Christmas is more poignant, more precious because of the horror we have just witnessed when young children and their teachers were senselessly murdered in Connecticut.  I think we all feel the need to hug our children a little tighter and an increased, almost urgent desire to spend time with those we love.  As President Obama said, our hearts are broken for the families who will have a lonely holiday season and whose children they are no longer able to hug.  This tragedy has reminded us once again how fortunate we are to have family and loved ones to celebrate with.

  

This year more than ever, I will appreciate and enjoy the big, noisy family I share my holiday meals with.  I will listen with gratitude as laughter rings throughout the house while my heart will ache for those families whose homes are silent because their little one was so cruelly taken away.  How sad this Christmas will be for them, as will every other Christmas from now on.  

More than ever, I will enjoy that comfortable feeling that comes from being with family who know each other better than anyone else ever could – and still like each other!  I always marvel at the inter-generational exchanges and how age doesn't matter at a family gathering. We all have something in common: each other.  We are all so alike and yet so different from each other. That is the magic of family, and it becomes even more magical at Christmas.  The horrific event in Connecticut has taken away not only a family member, but the magic of the season for so many innocent families.  As you celebrate your good fortune with loved ones this season, take a moment to send loving thoughts to those who, rather than planning meals and opening gifts, are planning funerals and grieving.  And don’t forget to hug your children and your loved ones.  

To each of you, I offer my  best wishes for a very Merry Christmas.  May your holiday celebration be perfect and create wonderful memories to cherish for a lifetime.

Knowing how fortunate we are to have family and friends close by during the holiday season . . . it's a good thing.

A Woman of Distinction

Last night, the Prince Albert YWCA held its Women of Distinction award banquet at which they honoured five deserving women. One of the women they honoured, Lynda Monahan, holds a special place in my heart and I am so pleased she was chosen.

            Lynda was honoured in the Arts, Culture and Heritage category for her enormous contribution in the field of writing. A wonderful and passionate poet, two books of her poetry have been published. Both books, “A Slow Dance In The Flames” and ‘What My Body Knows” were nominated for a Saskatchewan Book Award. Her second book was also nominated for a World Guild Writing Award. Her work has been published in many magazines, including Grain, Fire, Amethyst Review, Other Voices and many others. Her poetry has been broadcast on both provincial and national CBS radio programs.

            Lynda does a great deal of work in the community. She has instructed special workshops at Prince Albert Youth Outreach Program and has facilitated a series of workshops for inmates at Pine Grove Correctional Centre and for at-risk youth in the Eagle Program. Lynda has worked with adults who have acquired brain injuries and their families, resulting in the book “With A Smile and a Tear: Family’s Story of Acquired Brain Injury”. She has completed a Saskatchewan Writers Guild ArtSmart youth mentorship program for young writers. Lynda has worked with our local schools, Commonweal, Canadian Mental Health Association and Prince Albert Foster Families. Through all of this, she still finds time to teach a Creative Writing class at SIAST. Through her work, Lynda has brought joy, healing and purpose to many lives.

            Lynda is a wonderful a passionate teacher and injects her love of writing to all who take part in her classes and workshops. She inspires all those she teaches into putting their thoughts and feelings down on paper. Under her guidance, her students develop the self-confidence they need in order to write and the bravery to show others what they have written. I know this first hand as I have been one of Lynda’s students. To be a student in one of her classes is to know that you are being led by a passionate teacher who finds good in everyone and, in fact, brings out the best in all her students. Lynda guides her students along with positive advice and encouragement.

            At the Women of Distinction award ceremony, many of Lynda’s past and present students were in attendance to see her receive her award. Their presence is evidence of what makes Lynda so special. It is an indication of the effectiveness of her teaching, the far reaches of her compassion and her calm, encouraging personality, that all who begin as students in her class inevitably come to consider her a life-long friend.

            Congratulations, my friend. Well done.  Deserving people receiving recognition . . . it’s a good thing.

 

 

One Hundred Days of Give Aways

Sometimes the simplest idea turns out to be the great idea.  My friend Barb has recently proven this to be true.  It all started when she decided to “de-clutter” her house.  Rather than simply pack up the belongings she no longer wanted and haul them away, she came up with the idea of having “100 Days of Give-aways”.  Every day for one hundred days, a new item is selected and a picture of it is put up on facebook.  The first person to claim it is the recipient.

            I have watched with interest as she has put up her daily choice.  Barb has offered everything from scrapbooking kits, to a set of glass candle holders to Christmas decorations.  As I watched the items being claimed on facebook and plans being made for pick-up or delivery, I began to realize what a great idea this is.  I didn’t know the half of it!

            One day Barb’s offering was a book I had been wanting to read.  I jumped at the chance to claim it and was successful.  What followed is what made me realize just what Barb had done with her little “100 Days of Give-aways” and how she had, perhaps unwittingly, created a social event with many of her friends.

            Barb and I tried to plan a day to get together for coffee or lunch so that I could claim my book.  There was not one day in that week that worked.  Either Barb was out-of-town or one of us was busy when the other was free.  It simply did not work, which is something that often happens in our busy lives when friends try to plan time together.  One day Barb emailed me to say that she would drop the book off to me at work that afternoon.  I emailed her back to say I would not be in my office that particular afternoon and asked if I could stop by at her house just before lunch to pick up the book and perhaps we could have coffee.  She said that wouldn’t work as she was still in her pyjamas.  I sent back a message to her asking if I could just stop in at her  house and she could slip the book to me through the door.  She laughingly agreed.

            So, it was that I found myself on Barb’s doorstep, admiring her many creations on her porch and knocking on her bright yellow front door.  Barb greeted me, in her pjs’s, book in hand.  We stood on the doorstep and talked for probably twenty minutes. After a great conversation, I walked away with my new book and realized what Barb had just done.  If she had not had had her “100 Days of Give-aways”, we would still be trying to arrange a time to get together.  Because of her inventiveness, we met, had a great conversation and renewed our friendship, even if it was only for a quick visit.  I realize that Barb is doing this with all of her friends who claim prizes – one day at a time for a hundred days!  Ingenious!  Plus, she is cleaning her house.  Everyone wins.

            When I opened my book to read it, there was a little “bonus” from Barb.  She had included a little crafted card (which she created herself, crafty person that she is) with a thank you for giving her item new life and for our friendship.  How perfect is that?

            Sometimes a simple little idea like de-cluttering your house turns into a unique way to renew old acquaintances and forces everyone to take a few minutes to talk to an old friend.  By my calculations, Barb has about eighty days left on her give-away, so who knows, we may slip in another twenty minute visit on her porch soon again.  Good ideas that turn out to be great ideas . . . it’s a good thing.

Remembrance Day

Although Remembrance Day falls on the week-end this year, I hope people will still take the time to attend ceremonies and acknowledge our veterans.   Remembrance Day is growing in significance every year, perhaps because we have a new group of veterans now – young men and women who have taken part in the war in Afghanistan.  Young people, who in the past may not have worn poppies, now do so with pride, respect and thankfulness. All generations are attending Remembrance Day Services in record numbers. We all feel the need to thank veterans, including our new veterans who have returned from Afghanistan or from peace keeping missions all over the world, in a way we never have felt before. Perhaps it is because of Afghanistan, the phenomenon of the Highway of Heroes and the death of our first female soldier that we have become more passionate about honouring our veterans.  For the third year now, students at St. Mary High School have met with and interviewed soldiers, and have recorded their stories in a book.  As the students learn of the sacrifices and horrors directly from the veterans, they come to realize how important it is to always remember and acknowledge what these brave soldiers gave to us.  Because of this project, the stories of our local soldiers are recorded and will continue to be passed on even after they are gone. 

It has been two year since the last WW I veteran died - they are now all gone. We have lost many of our WW II veterans.  It now becomes even more important to honour their sacrifices, and to never forget what they did for us. It is also important to show our gratitude to our young veterans who have fought in a different war. We must continue to teach our children that the many rights they now enjoy were fought for by very brave men and women. As we look at the suffering of people in countries that do not have the freedoms and rights we enjoy, we realize how very fortunate we are. Just as our parents and grand-parents were touched by wars, buried their soldiers and welcomed home those who survived, our generation is experiencing war and we are sending our own brothers and sisters, sons and daughters to fight.

Remembrance Day is the day to remember all the wars we have faced as a nation, to thank our soldiers and to reflect on how fortunate we are. Remembering and being grateful to the men and women in our armed forces - present and past -  is important every day, but never so important as on Remembrance Day.  Taking time to show our gratitude to our veterans and soldiers . . . it's a good thing.