Oh Canada!

 

The Winter Olympics have just concluded and I have just watched the closing ceremonies.  During the two weeks of the 2014 Olympics, I, like most Canadians, experienced an entire range of emotions from tense anxiety prior to games and competitions to pride as our athletes won gold, silver and bronze medals.  Even those who did not win medals displayed sportsmanship, dedication to their sport and pride for our country and we can be proud of all our Canadian athletes.  In fact, news outlets all over the world commented on the kindness and friendliness of Canadian athletes and spectators.  But no one gave us the glowing review and high praise in such detail as Tanya Chen of Buzzfeed.com, an American on-line site, in her story “10 Ways Canada Has Already Won The Winter Olympics” which she posted on February 12 – only five days into the 2014!  Five days in and she was telling the world how Canada had already won the Winter Olympics!  These are the reasons she gave (and yes, it is ok to swell your chest in pride).

1.     “When the Canadian Institute of Diversity and Inclusion released its response to Russia’s anti-LGBT laws. This was done through the release of a 30-second commercial advocating the gay rights. It is very well done, humorous but gets the point across.

2.     “When an Olympic qualifier took one for Team Canada and gave up his spot to another teammate.” Chen is of course referring to Gilmore Junio who gave up his spot in the 1000 meter speed skating to Denny Morrison. Morrison went on to win silver.

3.     “When, shortly after his win, Morrison started a Twitter campaign to select Junio as Canada’s flag bearer during the Sochi closing ceremonies.” We now know that Junio was not selected to be our flag bearer, but it was a very nice gesture on the part of Morrison.

4.     “When a Canadian coach helped a Russian skier complete his Olympic race with dignity.” This was one of my favorite moments of the Olympics.  What a wonderful action on the part of Canadian cross-country coach Justin Wadsworth and so “Canadian”.  So proud of that coach.  This was also, by the way, chosen by CNN as the third most memorial Olympic Moment out of fifteen.   

5.     “When they showed everyone up by creating an ingenious beer fridge that can only be accessed by a Canadian passport.” I love this concept and I love the pictures of Canadians accessing refreshments by scanning their passports. 

6.     “When Ottawa’s mayor shut down some haters in the best possible way.”  Mayor Jim Watson flew the Pride Flag in Ottawa through-out the duration of the 2014 Winter Olympics. Many other cities followed suite, but Chen rightly credits him because he led the way.

7.     “When only two of the Dufour-Lapointe sisters took medals home but all three siblings cheered for each other.”  These free-style skiers are so supportive of each other and take such pride in the accomplishments of their siblings. It is heart-warming to see sisters behave in this way in such a competitive setting. 

8.     “ When, after beating his fellow countryman to get gold, Alex Bilodeau left his competitor with only kind words” Bilodeau grew up with Mikael Kingsbury, they skied together, belonged to the same clubs and had the same coaches. When Alex won gold in freestyle skiing over Kingsbury who won silver, he was quick to praise him and proclaimed him to be the one who will win everything one day. 

9.     “When Bilodeau then dedicated his Olympic gold to his brother who has cerebral palsy.” We saw Bilodeau do this at the 2010 Vancouver Olympics and it was no less heart-wrenching to see him do this again in Sochi.   

10.   “And when — amid all sportsmanship and thoughtfulness — Canada actually won a bunch of medals.” On February 12 when Chen posted this, we were only up to eleven medals.  We would go on to more than double that number, which proves what Canadians have known all along: you can be nice and win at the same time. 

Tanya Chen, an American writing for an American site, has listed ten reasons why we as Canadians are winners regardless of how many medals we bring home.  Sometimes, we need to be reminded that it is ok to be nice and to be fair.  That is, after all, what makes us Canadian.   Winning the Olympics before it is even over . . . it's a good thing!

A Lesson in Compassion

 

Last week, my mother’s battle with Alzheimer’s disease came to end.  We were fortunate that my family and I were able to sit with her during her final days and to be with her as she reached that stage in her journey.  She was surrounded by people she cherished when she drew her last breath, my sister holding her hand.  Although we feel relief that her pain and confusion is over, we still grieve the loss of our mother.  We all thought we were ready for this inevitable stage, now we realize that one is never ready to lose a loved one no matter how much time you have had to prepare.

As my sister and I sat with Mom, we learned things about palliative care, compassion and support which we didn’t know before and had not realized until we were in that position. I think we learned important lessons which will make us more compassionate and will make us better people. We will, no doubt, be more supportive, and will know how to be more supportive, of friends and family members who are facing the loss of a loved one.

In the past, when friends or family were sitting by someone they cherish, waiting for them to pass, it never occurred to me to go and sit with them. It was not until I was sitting with Mom, hour after hour, day after day, that I realized how much I appreciated the friends and family who came by and sat with us. Some came only for a few minutes, others sat for hours with us. Some just sat quietly with us, others talked about Mom and their memories of her. There was much laughter and love in the room. No matter how long or how little time they stayed with us, or what they said or didn’t say, we were so grateful that they took the time to be with us and that they cared enough to do so.  I know that in the future, I will be much more attentive and supportive of family and friends who are preparing to let one of their own go. I will remember how helpful it is to have someone come by to sit and talk. I know I won’t worry about what to say or do, because it doesn’t matter. What matters is that I will be there, even if it is only a few minutes at a time. What matters the most, is that the family will know they are loved and that others feel their pain. Spending time with people who are hurting is such an easy and simple thing to do, and yet so meaningful.   

Of course, in this age of smart phones, I received many texts and emails with words of encouragement and support.  This is something else I will remember to do. Just to know that someone is thinking of you in your time of need really lifts your spirit. I am so grateful to all those friends who took the time to let me know they were thinking of us. Again this is something so simple, yet so touching. 

It is never easy to lose someone you love. I learned that having compassionate friends and family members who take the time to be with you and show you they care helps to ease the pain. Thank you to each of you and I promise to pay it forward.  Learning good things even when you are in pain . . . it’s a good thing!