A Friend

How do you handle people who are not very nice but find their way into your life, whether at work, through friends or through family? I think people end up in some type of confrontation, or one person is constantly hurt and seething inside. Writer T. Suzanne Eller tells an interesting story of how she handled someone who was not very nice and caused her a great deal of grief - her boss. He was very abrupt and often yelled at her, and many times reduced her to tears. One day, she decided she had had enough. She marched into his office, determined to give him "a piece of her mind". He looked up at her and gruffly said "What?". She told him that he was treating her badly and that he was not acting in a professional manner. He snickered. At that moment, she said a little prayer, asking for guidance and for help to say what she needed to say. She found herself saying this "I want to make you a promise. I will be your friend. I will treat you as you deserve to be treated, with respect and kindness. You deserve that. Everybody does". She left his office. For the rest of the week, he avoided her. After that, he would leave her assignments on her desk when she was out for lunch or away from her desk. Every time she saw him, she smiled. She left him cookies on his desk, or just a note saying "Have a nice day". She did this because "that's what friends do". He continued to avoid her. About a year later, she discovered that, at the age of 32 and with three young children, she had breast cancer. She was told that her prognosis was not good. During her hospital stay, many friends and family came to visit her. Some of them were uncomfortable and did not know what to say. Many times Suzanne was the one doing the comforting. On the last day of her hospital stay, her boss showed up carrying a package. He had not really spoken to her since that day in his office. He told her that in the package were tulip bulbs. She looked at him, not understanding what he meant. He said to her that if she planted the bulbs this fall, they would come up in the spring. She still didn't understand what he was trying to tell her. Finally , shuffling his feet and nervously clearing his throat, he told her "I just wanted you to know that I think you'll be there to see them when they come up". With tears in her eyes, she thanked him. He told her that although she couldn't see them now, next spring she would see what colours he had picked out for her, and he turned and left. Suzanne has been cancer-free for ten years now and every spring she sees those red-and-white striped tulips push their way through the soil, reminding her that her friend believed she would live to see them. How do you handle people who are not very nice but find their way into your life? Admiring people who insist on being a friend, even with people who are not very nice. . . it's a good thing.